What to Text Someone Who Lost a Family Member

What to Text Someone Who Is Grieving to Comfort Them

Updated February xi, 2022

Young man sitting on bed looking at his smartphone

Texting is non the ideal way to reach out to someone who is grieving, but sometimes it'due south the well-nigh appropriate fashion of condolences based on varying sets of circumstances. When you can't be in that location in person to offer your condolement and support, and your communication is typically washed via text, reaching out by text is far improve than not reaching out at all.

Text Messages to Send the Newly Grief-Stricken

Immediately following a death, the surviving spouse, parent, or child will likely be inundated by texts and letters. For many people, texting and messaging is a safe style to offer condolences. Other people have a reaction to the news of a death where they reach out to the grieving person to either ask, "Why didn't y'all tell me?" or "I'yard hurting and then much," neither of which is appropriate when someone is trying to process death. In the case of someone'southward passing, exist sure the text you transport is one of condolences. Furthermore, do not be offended if yous don't receive a response. The person on the receiving cease of the bulletin is dealing with many priorities that outrank returning a text bulletin.

Text Examples of Condolences Immediately Post-obit a Death

As soon as you hear of a person's passing, you might choose to immediately reach out and extend your beloved and support during their time of demand. Here are some examples of appropriate texts to send immediately following a death:

I'm leaving my phone on tonight in case yous want to talk. Information technology doesn't thing what fourth dimension, I will be there.
I can exist at your house by five:00. Let me come up over and help however you lot need it.
Don't worry almost responding... I just want yous to know I'k sorry and I'm hither for you.
I don't know the right words to say right now. But I am sad, and I love y'all.
I wish I could be at that place with you right now. Are in that location people there to assistance you lot?
What can I practise to help you right now?
I can't imagine how you're feeling correct now, simply I want you to know I am hither for yous.
I simply heard most (name of deceased'due south) passing. Please know you and your family are in my heart.
So profoundly sad at your loss. We are happy to assist in any way possible.
I know the expiry of (person who passed) was sudden and is however raw. I only wanted to text and allow you know I love you. I'll check in with yous in the next few days to meet where we can help.

Offering Condolences Via Text Message

You lot may non feel comfortable reaching out to the grieving person until a couple of days after the death of their loved one. Waiting a few days to extend condolences tin give those in mourning time to process the reality of the loved one'due south passing, and permit them to become into a headspace where they can deal with incoming texts. Call back to tailor your message to the human relationship level you have with the person suffering a loss. If you lot are extremely shut, a lengthy bulletin might suffice. If you exercise not communicate with the person on a regular or a deep level, keep the message brusk and curtailed. In every example of offering condolences, keep the focus on the person suffering, never on your own sadness.

Do y'all need help with the memorial service? I can assistance.
You're in our prayers, and we dear you lot.
(Deceased) was a fantastic person, and everyone will miss them.
Is at that place anything I can do to assist you? Anything at all?
(Deceased's) memory volition alive on through you lot. They were ever so proud of you.
Whatever I can do to back up you, I am willing and able.
Nosotros are all right there behind you lot, here to love you through this hard time.
We're pulling together some casseroles for your family. Let us know a delivery fourth dimension that works for you.
May I swing past and selection up the kids for a few hours so you can have some time to remember?
I'thousand here to drive y'all around, bring you food, make clean your kitchen, run errands, brand phone calls, or do anything else you need.

Showing Your Support Later on the Crowd Leaves

Grieving people don't magically finish grieving but because a funeral or memorial service has happened. In fact, this is the time they are probably most vulnerable since all the offers of help have started to wane, and they are left with the gaping pigsty that is profound loss and sadness. Reaching out to someone to check upwards on them as they are in the midst of the grieving process tin be a thoughtful gesture on your office. You lot may find that texting the grieving person later services allows them to be more than willing to engage in conversation than they would accept been immediately following the death.

Text Examples for Those Grieving a Loss

These texts offer support that isn't vague, but rather specific to the possible needs of a grieving individual who has suffered a tremendous and recent loss. They help remind the grieving person that while this might be the almost solitary they take ever felt, they are indeed non solitary, and people care nearly them and continue to want to help them through this difficult time.

Does your schedule allow you to get away for coffee on Thursday? Name the identify, and I can exist there!
May I accept some meals sent to you? Whatever special requests?
I'm thinking of you correct now and sending good energy your mode.
I can't take away your pain, simply I tin offer y'all a listening ear, a cup of tea, or a large hug at any time.
I am here for you and am e'er available to talk nearly anything. Y'all are loved, and I want to aid you.
I'chiliad deplorable I can't be there in person right at present; I am here for you lot in whatever style I tin help.
I care about you lot, and I'k deplorable you had to go through this.
Whenever you demand a friend, dial this number.
Hey friend, reaching out to run across how you are and if you lot desire to talk?
Merely texting to say I love yous.

Texts of Back up to Send Someone Who's Missing the Deceased

The anniversary of a person's expiry tin be difficult to deal with, every bit can the deceased's birthday or whatsoever other special occasion to which the deceased was tied (such equally a wedding anniversary). Mark these dates on your personal agenda, and make sure to accomplish out to their loved ones on meaning milestone days. These specific days will likely be challenging for years to come, and a few words via text can make them feel supported and considered.

I know today is an of import mean solar day. Are you doing OK?
Do you feel like talking? I tin call you later on work if you'd like.
Today reminds me of that lake trip we took for your second anniversary. (Deceased) was the all-time swimmer by far! They will be missed.
Here's my favorite picture of (Deceased) - They volition be missed! (attach a photo of Deceased)
I'yard drinking a beer in memory of (Deceased) and toasting them right now.
I saw a gorgeous rainbow in the sky today. Of class, things of beauty are everywhere on (Deceased)'s birthday!
On (blank's birthday), I like to recollect of them (insert the favorite activity of the person who passed).
Some days are harder than others, I am sure. While I can't pretend to know such insurmountable grief as you do, I imagine today is difficult. Thus, I wanted to cheque in and tell you I dear you.
Nosotros cry because nosotros miss them then, just smile for all the memories that we had fourth dimension to create with them. Hoping you are surrounded past the fondest thoughts of your days together.
If you want company today, I am here. If you need to exist alone, I empathise entirely. Merely know I'm a text message or phone call away.

Texting an Acquaintance Later on They Feel a Loss

Should you text someone who doesn't necessarily fall inside your category of "loved ones" (like a co-worker or friend of a friend) after they experience the death of someone shut to them? Yes. If texting is the simply choice, a text of condolences can help the person feel a little less lonely. In this instance, don't endeavor to brand the aforementioned argument you lot would for someone close to you. Instead, a simple text is your best bet. Your message should focus on comforting the recipient. Don't expect them to open to you lot if you aren't particularly close, but be prepared for the possibility that they express emotions openly with yous. Remember, you lot don't know this person equally closely as you know others, so guessing at how they process grief won't be possible. Be open to whatever type of response you receive.

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I, too, have lost my (blank), and while I don't pretend to know your level of grief, I tin can sympathize with this challenging time.
Your cubicle crew is thinking of you lot during this challenging time. (For a work acquaintance).
I cannot take away your pain, but I can take away your hunger. (Donuts and coffee are in the breakroom).
Is there anything I can take intendance of for you here at the function while you're gone? I want to aid you in any way I can.
Hi, I heard through (blank) you lost (bare). So lamentable to hear virtually this. You are in our thoughts.
I wanted to drop a notation letting yous know how sorry we all were to hear about your loss.
Please take whatever time y'all demand to process your loss and be with your family. We have work covered. (From a director to an employee).
So sorry to hear about (blank'south passing.) I recollect how fondly you lot spoke of them. You are in our thoughts during this terribly hard time.
So saddened by the loss of your (bare). Annihilation I tin take off of your plate, please let me know. (Advisable for a co-worker).

Tips for Sending Comforting Texts

A text is a quick way to check in on someone who is hurting due to the loss of a loved one. If you know the person well or are close to them (proximity speaking), offer assistance in a specific way. If y'all are not shut emotionally or locationally, all the same attain out to permit those suffering know you are thinking of them.

Brevity and Tone

Keep your text brief, especially when the news of the decease is relatively new. The recipient will be dealing with myriad emotions, and reading through a lengthy text might be a chore. Too, remember that texting lacks the benefit of nonverbal communication; read and re-read your text before sending information technology to ensure information technology can't be misunderstood.

Simplicity Is Key

It may feel generic to transport a text that says, "I'm sorry for your loss" or "My prayers are with you," but if you're having trouble forming the right words, it's improve to send a simple text than not contact the person at all. Requite yourself a lilliputian grace if yous are grieving also, or if you accept little experience with the process of losing someone close to you. Nobody expects y'all to come up upwardly with the perfect words, and no matter how great or profound your words might be, you cannot ever have the pain away for another.

Avert Clichés

"Everything happens for a reason," or "God must have needed another angel," probably isn't going to assistance the person feel comforted because both statements bespeak a higher power wanted the person expressionless. It's not a very comforting thought unless the recipient believes in a divine programme and accepts it. It is best to avoid these types of condolences unless you are absolutely sure they will resonate with the person on the other finish of your text message.

Know When a Text Is Appropriate and When Information technology Is Not

A text is sometimes not the best fashion to reach out to someone grieving the loss of a loved ane. People who don't typically text might be offended by a condolences text instead of comforted, since texts can be too casual for a state of affairs such as decease. Decide if texting is the correct decision. Consider the person grieving and your personal relationship with them. If texting is indeed the all-time choice, be thoughtful in what you lot send, as words can exist impactful during an emotional time.

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Source: https://dying.lovetoknow.com/words-comfort-after-death/what-text-someone-who-is-grieving